If you you know me, it’s likely you already know that my little guy struggled with weight gain early on. As a result, I’ve become very paranoid about how much he’s eating and making sure he’s gaining weight well.
He’s been doing great since he hit about 6.5/7 months, but like many babies, his eating habits fluctuate, and it has become a little nerve wrecking for me! Once Jack finally started eating his solids well, his formula intake dropped significantly. At his 9 month appointment, his pediatrician said he was growing really well, so his 15-20oz per day, plus solids, was just fine.
When Jack started getting better at drinking from a straw cup I eventually eliminated all day time bottles and offered formula only in a cup. He would get a bottle each morning and at bedtime, but that was it. Once he really got the hang of it, closer to 11 months, his formula intake dropped again. He would take a full 5-6oz from his first bottle, but sometimes only 4-6oz TOTAL during the day. As long as he finished 5-6oz from his nighttime bottle I wasn’t too worried. But then THAT started to drop, too. Sometimes he would take only a few ounces, sometimes nothing at all! I even tried giving him a smaller dinner, but that didn’t work! I started to worry that he was going to become dehydrated, or that he wasn’t getting the right nutrition for a child under 1.
So being the paranoid mother that I am, I made an 11 month well check with our pediatrician. I know, I know, there’s a well check at 12 months. But I didn’t want to wait another month to find out if my baby was growing well and take the chance that something was wrong!
We found out at this well check that since his 9 month appt, Jack had gained 1lb 12oz and about 2 inches in length. He was steady at the 50th percentile, which was up from the 10th percentile at 6 months. I still asked a lot of questions. Is it ok that he’s not drinking much? Should I offer other liquids? Should we go back to daytime bottles?
Our pediatrician kept emphasizing that I should follow his lead. Trust him. Baby knows what he needs. Even if he doesn’t seem to be eating and drinking much.
The thing about babies is that they haven’t learned how to manipulate their hunger. I see a piece of chocolate cake and can consume it regardless of how full I am. Many people eat less in order to change they way they look. Not babies. They don’t even have this concept. What babies know is hunger and fullness. And, unlike most of us adults, they eat just what they need - no more and no less. If we try to force them to eat more, we may have a mess to clean up later.
One thing I do NOT want to teach Jack, or any of my future children, is to ignore their own hunger and satisfaction cues. Many of us grew up being told to eat one more bite of vegetables or to clean our plates. I’m not criticizing any of our parents, but I certainly don’t want my child to become an overeater because I think he’s not eating enough. Who am I to say how hungry he is?
It’s hard for me to not keep offering Jack one more bite when he’s already indicated he’s done. It’s really hard. But I have to trust my baby. He won’t starve himself. He hasn’t even learned the concept nor does he have any reason to. I have to trust that if he says no, he really doesn’t need it.
Jack is just over 20 months now, but I know that many parents of older children have the same struggle. It doesn’t just end with babies - the struggle will continue throughout our children’s lives. I hope that as Jack gets older I am able to teach him a healthy view of food and nutrition so that when he does learn that he can over or under eat, he will have no desire to do either.
And in the meantime, I’m going to trust that my baby knows when he’s hungry and when he’s full.
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